Emotional Regulation
What is Emotional regulation?
Emotional regulation is when you can understand your emotions and control how you respond to them. The goal is not to stop or suppress the emotion, but to learn how to respond less reactively and support yourself through the emotion.
When you find it difficult to respond without reacting, or feel as though your emotions are leading your actions, you may be struggling with emotional regulation difficulties. This can make it harder to manage strong emotions and respond to situations appropriately.
What can emotional regulation difficulties look like?
If you’re struggling to regulate your emotions you may find yourself:
Feeling overwhelmed by big emotions
Finding it difficult to calm down once upset
Reacting quickly or impulsively when emotional
Becoming easily irritated or frustrated
Finding it difficult to communicate how you’re feeling
Having emotional reactions that feel bigger than the situation
Struggling to move on from upsetting situations
Feeling guilty or regretful after reacting emotionally
Avoiding situations because of difficult emotions
Finding it difficult to recognise or understand how you’re feeling
What can cause emotional regulation difficulties?
There are many different factors that can contribute to difficulties with emotional regulation.
Ongoing stress or feeling overwhelmed
Difficult or stressful life experiences
Trauma
Mental health conditions such as; anxiety, depression and borderline personality disorder (BPD)
Difficulties with self-esteem or confidence
Relationship difficulties
Major life changes or transitions
Neurodevelopmental disorders such as; ADHD and ASD
Lack of sleep or insomnia
Sometimes, emotion regulation difficulties can develop overtime, while for others they may have been present from a young ages. It can also be a combination of different factors, and understanding what may be contributing to these difficulties can be an important first step towards learning how to manage them.
How can psychology help?
Psychology can help you understand your emotional patterns, what triggers them, and the costs-benefits on reacting to them, to support you to develop more helpful coping strategies to improve communication, build resilience, and feel more in control of your emotion.
Our Clinical Psychologist Registrar, Alannah Konners, works one-on-one with clients struggling with their emotional regulation, as well as in a group setting providing Dialectical behavioural therapy skills-training. Alannah is a trauma-informed psychologist, her approach is gentle, collaborative, and person-centred - focused on helping clients understand and navigate difficulties with emotional regulation, trauma, interpersonal conflict, personal identity, and mental health concerns through a holistic lens.
Please see link to our blog post on emotional regulation below for more information.