Moving Towards What Matters: Understanding Acceptance and Commitment Therapy
Make space for what you feel, and keep moving towards what matters.
We all experience difficult thoughts and emotions from time to time. Whether it’s anxiety, sadness, frustration or self-doubt, these feelings can sometimes make us want to avoid certain situations or push uncomfortable thoughts away. While avoiding difficult emotions can provide short-term relief, it can sometimes stop us from doing the things that are important to us. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is an approach that can help us accept difficult thoughts and emotions while still moving towards what matters to us. Rather than trying to get rid of difficult thoughts or feelings, ACT focuses on changing the way we respond to them and helping us build a life that is meaningful and aligned with our values.
What is ACT?
ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) is a form of psychotherapy that focuses on developing psychological flexibility. It helps individuals learn to accept difficult thoughts and emotions rather than constantly trying to avoid, control or change them.
ACT encourages us to notice our thoughts and feelings without allowing them to completely control our behaviour. By understanding what is important to us, we can begin to take meaningful steps towards the life we want, even when difficult emotions are present.
How can ACT help?
ACT can help us develop practical skills for managing difficult thoughts and emotions while staying connected to our values and goals.
Acceptance
Acceptance involves making space for difficult thoughts, feelings and experiences rather than constantly fighting against them. Acceptance doesn’t mean that you have to like or agree with something that is happening. Instead, it means recognising that difficult emotions are a normal part of life and allowing them to be present without letting them control your actions.
Being present
ACT encourages us to focus on what is happening in the present moment rather than becoming caught up in the past or worrying about the future. By becoming more aware of our thoughts, feelings and surroundings, we can learn to respond to what is happening rather than automatically reacting to it.
Understanding your thoughts
Our thoughts can feel very convincing, particularly when we are experiencing strong emotions. ACT helps us learn to notice our thoughts without automatically believing everything our mind tells us. For example, having the thought “I’m not good enough” doesn’t necessarily mean that it is true. Learning to notice the thought as a thought can create some distance between what we think and how we choose to respond.
Identifying your values
Values are the things that are important to us and the qualities we want to bring into our lives. ACT helps us explore what really matters to us, whether that is our relationships, family, career, health, creativity or personal growth. Understanding our values can give us direction when we feel stuck or unsure about what to do next.
Committed action
Once we understand what matters to us, ACT encourages us to take steps towards those things. This doesn’t mean waiting until we feel confident, motivated or completely comfortable. Sometimes we can take meaningful action while still feeling anxious, uncertain or afraid. For example, someone who values connection might choose to reach out to a friend even when they are feeling anxious about how they will respond.
Moving towards what matters
One of the key ideas in ACT is that we don’t always have control over the thoughts and emotions that show up, but we can develop more choice in how we respond to them. It can be easy to put things off until we feel better. We might think, “I’ll do it when I’m less anxious” or “I’ll try when I feel more confident.” ACT encourages us to consider whether we can take a small step towards what matters, even when difficult feelings are present. Rather than asking ourselves, “How can I get rid of this feeling?” ACT encourages us to ask, “What matters to me, and what can I do to move towards it?”
What might ACT look like in therapy?
At Presence of Mind Psychology, ACT can be used in individual therapy to help clients better understand their thoughts, emotions and behaviours. Therapy may involve:
Exploring patterns of avoidance
Identifying your values and what is important to you
Learning to respond differently to difficult thoughts
Practising mindfulness and staying present
Understanding how thoughts and emotions influence behaviour
Setting meaningful goals
Taking small steps towards the things that matter to you
ACT is a collaborative approach, and your psychologist will work with you to understand what you are experiencing and develop strategies that are relevant to your life.
Who can ACT help?
ACT can be helpful for people experiencing a range of psychological difficulties, including:
Anxiety
Depression
Stress
Low self-esteem
Chronic pain or illness
Difficult emotions
Life changes and uncertainty
Avoidance and feeling stuck
You don’t need to have a specific diagnosis to benefit from ACT. The skills and ideas used in ACT can be helpful for anyone who wants to better understand their thoughts and emotions, reduce avoidance and move towards a more meaningful life.
When might it be time to seek support?
There are some signs that ACT could be beneficial if you find yourself:
Avoiding things that are important to you because of difficult emotions
Feeling controlled by your thoughts or worries
Waiting to feel better before taking action
Feeling stuck in the same patterns
Struggling to identify what is important to you
Finding that anxiety, stress or difficult emotions are affecting your everyday life
How can psychology help?
Our psychologists will work collaboratively with you to understand your thoughts, emotions and behaviours, explore what matters to you and develop practical strategies to help you move towards the life you want. ACT is not about eliminating difficult emotions or making life feel perfect. Instead, it is about learning to make space for the difficult parts of life while continuing to move towards the things that matter to you.